Frustrated right now! (thinking time)

Im really feeling quite frustrated and trying to keep my cool... i dont know whether im going to break down and cry or whether im ready to scream yell and kick someone! Im really struggling not to give into these urges with my current mood and state of mind. I have been reading my book for inspiration and to try keep me focused on something positive and not resorting to self harm or anything silly right before reaching my goal....

Some questions i need to ask myself and think about... `

• Why do i feel the need to hurt myself?
• What has brought me to this point?
• Have i been here before?
• What did i do to deal with it?
• How did i feel then?
• What have i done to ease the discomfort so far?
• What else can i do right now that wont hurt me?
• How do i feel right now?
• How will i feel when i am hurting myself?
• How will i feel after hurting myself?
• How will i feel tomorrow morning?
• Can i avoid this trigger, or deal with it better in the future?
• Do i need to hurt myself?

I am thinking about these questions as i write them.... asking myself in my head... im not sure i can or should fully answer them all here, i think i am less likely to answer them honestly when its on display, the important thing is for me to ask myself, and work out what's best for me right now, and not just now but later as well....

Theres some more questions which i can use and ask myself, including:

• Do you have effective methods for stopping yourself? Please describe them.
• Have you ever self harmed in front of anyone?
• Are you "out" about self harm? How do you hide it? Do you know anyone else who does this?
• If you have told people about your self harm, how did you do it? How did they react?
• Have you been medically treated for self inflicted wounds/injuries? How many times? What were the attitudes of treatment providers like?
• Have you taken medication to control self harm? What medications (at what doses) worked best for you?
• Have you ever been hospitalised because of self harm? What were the circumstances?
• have you ever lost a therapist because he/she couldnt deal with your self harming behaviours?
• What have been the consequences of self harm in your life?
• Do you have a history of trauma or abuse?

This is all some pretty deep thinking material really when you read through it all, think about it and answer each question....